6 Ways to Make Your Child Listen to You

Always use positive sentences while giving suggestion or direction
Instead of using negative sentences like Don’t jump on the table, don’t run on the stair case we can say jump on the trampoline, you can run outdoors. Positive suggestions are constructive as they tell children what to do whereas negative suggestions are interfering and limit the act.

Allow child to make choices and decisions only when you intend to leave the situation up to children and respect their decision

It’s always good to limit the choices in front of the child as it helps you to have control over the situation while giving an opportunity for the child to exercise his choice. E.g.: Ask the child what will you have first, chapatti or rice? And not vague questions with broad choices like what do you want to eat for lunch?  Such questions help you respect decisions made by the child. When we offer choice it is important to respect the decision made by children else it creates confusion in the child’s mind.

 

Use voice as teaching tool

E.g. If a teacher is shouting at the top of her voice at children asking them to keep quiet, then the purpose is not met. Instead, the teacher should use words and tone of voice which will help children feel confident and assured.

 

Avoid trying to change behaviour by methods which may lead to loss of self-respect

E.g. If child A hits child B, the teacher needs to try avoiding such encounters and if it still happens she needs to focus on the child who has got hurt and divert child A. Later, in some discussion it can be mentioned that we use hands for eating, writing, holding etc. only. Teachers also need to understand why a child is upset, biting, hitting others. Most often it would be due to issues in spoken language development, poor social skills etc. and the solution for the problem is to rectify the challenges. Make the child feel respected for what he/she is. The child needs to have positive self-respect to make efforts to change him/her. Avoid labelling children as naughty, stubborn, selfish.

 

Avoid motivating by comparison or by competition

E.g. Teacher saying “A is through and has done it so well, come on you should also finish” Or Teacher saying “let me see who is doing it faster A or B”. Children at this age are not equipped to take failure, they may feel helpless and slowly may withdraw themselves from participating and they may lose confidence of working with autonomy.

 

Positive redirections are one of the most effective method to solve temper tantrums

 

E.g. If child “A” is upset and tries hitting or bother child “B”, then the teachers can suggest the child to do painting or observe the fish in the aquarium or read a book or water the plants etc. In this way the child gets some time for himself/herself and this helps in settling the child. Always while redirecting the teacher should focus on the value and objective of the act, this helps the child to shift from one act to another.

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